


but somethings you can't undo, and one of them's you

by tommyshepherdd (atimeforflores)



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Green Lantern (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miscommunication, Mpreg, Trans Hal Jordan, assumed unrequited pining, trans man Hal Jordan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-22
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-11-27 21:11:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18199376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atimeforflores/pseuds/tommyshepherdd
Summary: The point still stood however, that the only reason Hal ever met most of Bruce’s kids was because the kids themselves were stubborn and followed Bruce to the Justice League HQ. At no point did Bruce purposefully try to introduce him to his kids. Hal knew how much they meant to him, and yeah, it hurt that Bruce didn’t really want them to overlap.





	but somethings you can't undo, and one of them's you

Naturally, Barry was the first person that Hal told. He was the first person to wrap Hal up in a warm hug, telling him it was going to be alright. Iris had come in shortly after he had been bundled up on their couch with a sniffle and their best comforter. She was glowing in her early stage of pregnancy, cooing softly when he revealed what was going on and promising that it did get better. Wally, the ever oblivious teen, was just happy that another one of his favorite uncles was over and available for snuggles. 

 

Bruce hadn’t called him in over a week. It wasn’t an odd occurrence in and of itself, but under the circumstances it left him feeling cold and empty. Hal knew that it was a busy week in Gotham with the Joker breaking out of Arkham, again, and with Jason once again disobeying Bruce’s orders that he wasn’t yet allowed to return as Robin. 

 

Hal remembered the broken sound that Bruce let out when they had finally found Jason in the Joker’s clutches after 3 months. He remembered the bloody scar that ran across Jason’s cheek, the picked over edges that were still bleeding sluggishly. Hal hadn’t been in Bruce’s life long at that point, as the JL had formed after Dick’s adoption and right before Bruce had taken Jason in. 

 

At first Hal had thought that Bruce was arrogant and rude, and Bruce had thought that Hal was immature and reckless. That somehow turned to the nights spent together and the mornings spent doing the walk of shame. Bruce still went out as Brucie, kissing pretty women’s cheeks and schmoozing with rich men. Hal pushed away his own jealousy and insecurity. 

 

Hal wanted to ignore the problem as long as he truly could, or at least until it came around to bite him in the ass. Barry had already promised, with the consent of Iris, that Hal could move into their spare bedroom and share the nursery that the twins would use. The concept of having a baby was still foreign to Hal, even though he had known the possibility was there since his earliest consciousness of gender. 

 

The point still stood however, that the only reason Hal ever met most of Bruce’s kids was because the kids themselves were stubborn and followed Bruce to the Justice League HQ. At no point did Bruce purposefully try to introduce him to his kids. Hal knew how much they meant to him, and yeah, it hurt that Bruce didn’t really want them to overlap. 

 

Hal had been under the impression that the usage of testosterone would leave him unable to conceive. Something that he later realized was foolish, but it was too late to change anything. The most he could do was hide away and try to hide the truth from Bruce as long as possible. Not that Hal thought that Bruce wouldn’t be an excellent father, more towards the fact that he was afraid that Bruce wouldn’t want a child  _ with _ Hal.

 

So Hal stayed quiet, and he slowly slid himself out of League business. He responded less and less to calls for help, asking Barry to hand in his temporary resignation for him. Even then that didn’t get more than a few incensed text from Bruce, ones that Hal had taken to ignoring. He let the lease on his apartment run out, moved all of his things into the West household. It made a lot of things easier, including taking Wally out of public school due to his social anxiety and having Hal stay with him all day. Carol hadn’t taken his resignation the best, but after a few hushed phone calls and promises of silence, they were squared away. 

 

At 6 months, Hal felt like he truly couldn’t get any larger and he was unsure how he would be able to put up with 3 more months of the pregnancy. 

 

“Wally,” Hal groaned as the 16 year old dragged him out to the kitchen for the fifth time in an hour, “Just grab what you want and we can keep it in the living room. Barry and Iris don’t need to know that we ate in there.”

 

For someone has chaotic and messy as Barry was, he and Iris sure did keep the house abnormally tidy. 

 

“Breaking rules?” another voice came, pulling Hal’s attention from his nephew to the teenager sitting at the table. Dick was grinning at him from behind sunglasses, happily shoving spoonful after spoonful of sugary cereal into his mouth. 

 

Hal had the urge to cover his abdomen, to hunch in on himself and hide keep the secret he was so desperate to keep from Bruce. Dick’s eyes had already tracked his movement, eyes locked on the round curve of Hal’s stomach. 

 

“Just a few.” Hal said awkwardly, shifting his weight and trying to ignore the elephant in the room. Wally had busied himself with searching for snacks, somehow ignoring the tension in the room. 

 

“Looks like rules weren’t the only thing that broke.” Dick joked, eyes still intently staring at Hal’s stomach. 

 

“Looks like.” Hal echoed. 

 

…

 

Hal dropped back onto the couch, leaning back into the cushioned embrace of the furniture as he burst into tears. His sobs wracked his body and drowned out Dick’s frantic fawning. In just a few seconds, Hal found himself surrounded with a box of tissues, a neck pillow, a warm water bottle, and a nervous eighteen year old patting him on the stomach and asking if it was the baby that was causing him such distress. 

 

“D-d-don’t tell, _ Bruce! _ ” Hal finally shuddered out, wrapping one arm around his abdomen, and the other encircling the young man who was comforting him. 

 

“Oof!” Dick protested as he was squished into Hal’s side, “Okay, okay! I won’t!”

 

“You’re such a good kid!” Hal hiccuped, patting his own chest at the burn of indigestion he got from his crying and earlier snack. Dick didn't even flinch at being called a kid, something that Hal knew would usually send him into a tangent. 

 

“So this is why you have retired from the League?” Dick finally asked after it seemed Hal’s cries tapered off. Hal rubbed his stomach grumpily, pouting at Dick since he stopped running his fingers through Hal’s hair to comfort him. 

 

“Yeah.” Hal answered, “Wouldn’t be the smartest idea to take this little hitchhiker into battle.”

 

Dick cuddled into his side, hands rubbing at Hal’s distended abdomen and gasping when the baby kicked at him. In that moment Dick looked so happy, giggling as the baby fluttered under his hands, Hal had wished that he had the bravery to tell Bruce the truth. He had to hold back more tears at the thought of having an actual family with Bruce.

 

But he had too much to lose, too much on the line to really risk the upsettal of his life. 

 

“Dick look at me.” Hal told him, grabbing the younger man's hands, “I’m serious, you can’t tell Bruce about this.”

 

“Okay, okay.” Dick said, holding Hal’s gaze, “I just gotta know, is it his?”

 

The question made Hal sputter, “Bruce is the only one I’ve been...seeing for the past few months.” 

 

“Hm.” Dick hummed, hands returning to Hal’s abdomen, “Does he know that?”

 

“Dick,” Hal sighed, “I don’t think this is a conversation we should be having.”

 

“No.” A deep voice agreed from behind him, “It isn’t.”

 

Dick gasped, turning around to look at his father. Hal, once again, burst into tears. 

 

…

 

Hal couldn’t sleep in the too soft bed that night. Somehow Bruce had sweet talked him into gathering all of his things from the Allen’s house and into his manor. Hal had to admit that the ride over in the gorgeous car Bruce drove was amazing, and somehow the seat warmers worked all the aches out of his lower back. 

 

Hal was immediately swarmed by Bruce’s hoard of children when Bruce led him inside, a hand on the small of his back. Hal desperately wanted to lean into the touch, but withheld. He was still terrified of the unknown that would come. He had no control within Bruce’s home and was nothing more than a prisoner. 

 

He was tossing and turning for another twenty minutes before he finally decided to haul himself out of the guest bed and waddle down to the kitchen. He spent 30 minutes trying to find the kitchen before he finally saw lights on and followed them to the kitchen. 

 

“Hey,” Jason greeted him as he entered, waving him to him over a plate of milk and cookies. Hal smiled at him, crossing the room to wipe a spot of chocolate off his chin. Bruce’s second oldest had quickly become fond of the thought of a baby being brought to the house. Hal wouldn’t have been able to believe it if he hadn’t seen it with his own two eyes judging by the way he saw Jason push both Damian and Tim to the floor during the day that Hal had spent with them so far. The 16 year old used his much larger size to pick on his brothers. It seemed the only one safe was their younger sister. 

 

“There more where that came from?” Hal asked, pulling up a seat beside him. Jason silently slid the plate over to him. 

 

“Alfred makes the best chocolate chip cookies.” Jason told him. 

 

“I think Alfred makes the best everything.” Hal answered, putting an arm around Jason’s shoulders and hugging him. Like his older brother, Jason had practically been glued to Hal’s abdomen, oohing and awwing each time the baby kicked him. Both Tim and Cassandra kept their distance, preferring to observe the going ons. They both acted as if they had never seen a pregnant person before. Damian, at 6 years old, just wanted to use Hal as a step stool to his father. 

 

Hal groaned, trying to rub the kinks out of his own back. 

 

“You good?” Jason asked, eyeing him on a cautious manner. 

 

“Fine.” Hal answered shortly, bending forward to try to alleviate the pain. “It just takes a lot to cook up a baby.” 

 

“I think Alfred has some muscle relaxer.” Jason offered, nodding to one of the cabinets. 

 

“No, that's okay.” Hal told him, not quite sure what he could and couldn't take in his state. 

 

“Okay, well…” Jason trailed off, putting hid dishes in the sink. “I'm gonna try to get a few hours of sleep.” 

 

“Have a good night.” Hal called to the teens retreating back, sighing as he was met by the silence of the old manor.

 

Left alone with his own thoughts, Hal couldn't help but come up with more and more disastrous scenarios. They all led to the same thing; the baby taken, and Hal alone. 

 

He hadn't even realized he had once again began to cry when he felt a large hand on his shoulder. 

 

“Hal.” Bruce's somber voice greeted him. It only served to make him cry even harder. 

 

“Leave me alone.” He finally managed to get out, curling around his bump. “You can't have her yet.”

 

The hand on Hal's shoulder tightened until he was spun to face his former lover. There had been a time that Hal would have given anything to stay with Bruce, but in that moment all he wanted to do was escape. 

 

“Hey.” Bruce said, softer this time. He reached out a hand to brush away a tear, but froze when Hal flinched in fear. 

 

“God, Bruce.” Hal chuckled darkly, “Can't you just let me have this before you throw me out?”

 

Bruce's brows furrowed, and he looked almost adorably confused, “Throw you out-?” 

 

“She's my baby too!” Hal howled, suddenly lashing out in an attempt to claw at Bruce's chest in a weak attempt to escape, “I know you're mad at me for keeping her from you, and I know I'm selfish, but i don't want you to take her!”

 

Hal was sobbing again, slowly falling to his knees as Bruce held his wrists and slowed his descent. Bruce stared at him with an unreadable expression, something akin to horror shining through. 

 

“She's all I have.” He cried, struggles increasingly as Bruce's grip tightened and he was pulled forward. He didn't know what to expect and braced for a physical attack. 

 

Instead, he found Bruce wrapping his arms around his waist, pulling him close and shushing him. Feather light kisses were pressed to the side of his head as he continued to cry, until he was too exhausted to do so anymore. 

 

“Hal.” Bruce finally said, his own voice trembling. “I'm not going to keep her from you.” 

 

The utter sincerity in his tone made Hal begin to cry anew. He buried his face into the larger man's neck, knowing he must be covering him with snot and tears. The Bruce he thought he knew would have pushed him away in disgust, yet this one continued to rock him in comfort.

 

“I can't lose her.” Hal repeated, feeling his eyes grow heavy from the sheer amount of emotion he had displayed. As he drifted back to sleep he could still feel the feather light kisses being pressed to the side of his head. He finally gave in, and leaned into them fully. 

 

…

 

Hal once again awoke to a too soft bed, but this time there was a comforting weight situated behind him and a warm weight around his waist. 

 

The baby kicked, making Hal squirm uncomfortably as he realized just how bad he had to pee. 

 

Hal stilled as Bruce groaned beside him, pulling him closer and hand pressing back against the tiny foot.

 

“Your damn kid is too hyper.” Bruce growled, lifting his head to glare at Hal sleepily. He still had pillow imprints on his face, and was rocking a serious case of bed head. 

 

“Early riser like her daddy.” Hal responded, linking his fingers with Bruce's. Bruce's face softened as she kicked again, and he looked down at the bump in wonder. 

 

Before Hal could doubt himself, he darted forward and kissed Bruce. Bruce responded in kind, humming his approval into the kiss. 

 

“God.” Bruce groaned, “I love you so much.” 

 

Hal, in a move that he would later blame on pregnancy hormones, again burst into tears. Bruce looked panicked for a moment, quickly assessing Hal to see if he was in any pain.

 

“I didn't think I'd get to have this!” Hal cried, pulling Bruce into a mix of salty kisses. 

 

Bruce chuckled, working on soothing his partner. Hal lost track of time as he was lathed with Bruce's ministrations. 

 

The bliss of the morning was broken by Bruce's bedroom door slamming open. 

 

“Whoops.” Hal glanced over Bruce's shoulder where it was hiding his half naked state, seeing his best friends inflamed face. 

 

“I told you you didn't want to do that!” Dick panted as he jogged up behind Barry with a very pregnant Iris in tow. 

 

“Allen.” Bruce growled, “Leave. Now.” 

 

Hal had to laugh as his best friend sheepishly closed the door, laughs turning to giggles as Bruce returned to his previous activities. 

 

Later, he'd tear up again, at the thought that a unfound fear could have prevented him from so much happiness. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> first batlantern fic. im thinking of delving more into this au but am still undecided. i am not transgender, so if i am offensive please tell me. 
> 
> my tumblr is gaysupersoldiers.tumblr.com 
> 
> comments and prompts fuel me.


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